Life you want – Successful and Happy!

More than anything else, men and women seek happiness – Aristotle

Research have revealed that what makes experience genuinely satisfying is a state of consciousness, a state of concentration sResponseAbilityo focused that it amounts to absolute absorption in an activity. Everyone experiences this feeling from time to time and will recognize its characteristics: people typically feel strong, alert, in effortless control, unselfconscious, and at the peak of their abilities. Both a sense of time and emotional problems seem to disappear, and there is an exhilarating feeling of transcendence.

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By setting ourselves challenges, tasks that are neither too difficult nor too simple for our abilities. With such goals, we learn to order the information that enters consciousness and thereby improve the quality of our lives.

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Happiness does not depend on outside events, but rather on how we interpret them. Happiness, in fact, is a condition that must be prepared for, cultivated, and defended privately by each person. People who learn to control inner experience will be able to determine the quality of their lives, which is as close as any of us can come to being happy.

Therefore, happiness depends on inner harmony. The individuals who have inner harmony lead vigorous lives, are open to a variety of experiences, keep on learning until the day they die, and have strong ties and commitments to other people and to the environment in which they live. They enjoy whatever they do, even if tedious or difficult; they are hardly ever bored, and they can take in stride anything that comes their way.

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Optimal experience, where we feel a sense of exhilaration, a deep sense of enjoyment that is long cherished, does not come through passive, receptive, relaxing times. The best moments usually occur when a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile. Such experiences are not necessarily pleasant at the time they occur. Yet, in the long-run, optimal experiences add up to a sense of mastery, or perhaps, better, a sense of participation in determining the content of life. Because optimal experience depends on the ability to control what happens in consciousness moment by moment, each person has to achieve it on the basis of his own individual efforts and creativity. This happens when psychic energyWrite 2–or attention–is invested in realistic goals, and when skills match the opportunities for action.

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A person can make himself happy, or miserable, regardless of what is actually happening “outside”, just by changing the contents of consciousness. We all know individuals who can transform hopeless situations into challenges to be overcome, just through the force of their personalities. This ability to persevere despite obstacles and setbacks is the quality people most admire in others, and justly so; it is probably the most important trait not only for succeeding in life, but for enjoying it as well.

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The studies have suggested that the phenomenology of enjoyment has eight major components. When people reflect on how it feels when their experience is most positive, they mention at least one, and often all, of the following:
1. We confront tasks we have a chance of completing;
2. We must be able to concentrate on what we are doing;
3. The task has clear goals;
4. The task provides immediate feedback;
5. One acts with deep, but effortless involvement, that removes from awareness the worries and frustrations of everyday life;
6. One exercises a sense of control over their actions;
7. Concern for the self disappears, yet, paradoxically the sense of self emerges stronger after the flow experience is over; and
8. The sense of duration of time is altered.

It is by being fully involved with every detail of our lives, good and bad, that we find happiness, not by trying to look for it directly. J.S. Mill

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Mission of Goals!

So whats next once you have worked out your vision (refer to earlier blog Vision for life!) and worked out steps to reach it using missions (refer to earlier blog Mission for life!).

Just couple of points to recap –

Vision is long term and overarching purpose in life which one is really passionate about.

So next we need to take the vision and break it down to something mid-term and further arrange in sequence or in parallel depending what makes sense and lets call them missions. Now take these mid-term missions and further break them into immediately action-able goals.set and reach goal concept

Now we would discuss this last part of achieving the life you want. Breaking down mission into smaller objectives or goals (and further sub goals if need be) and actually working on each of them. Remember each goal works as a piece of jigsaw puzzle of life and fit somewhere to give your life a more closer picture towards your vision or ideal life. But each time one sets goal or create mission, there is always price you would have to pay on way to achieving it. So agree the price in advance you are willing to pay for life you want. Price may be inform of time spend away from loved one’s or more monetary like sacrificing holidays or new house to complete higher education or in some cases health. But on positive note, price you would pay would be much smaller and short term compared to returns you would most likely enjoy in long run and for longer term.

Remember 7 things when planning the goals: Proper planning is important before starting the upon goals but without getting too bogged (avoiding analysis paralysis) down into the process of planning and remembering the execution of goal is key.

1. Goals are S.M.A.R.T

S – Specific and significant.
M – Measurable and meaningful.
A – Appropriate and achievable.
R –  Realistic, results-oriented and rewarding.
T – timely and time-bound.

2. Always prioritise and prioritise correctly. Categorize your goals like  Financial and Career, Family and Home, Well-being so forth.
3. Yes and No are both choices and have impacts, so make a decision and stand by it.
4. Keeping It Real.
5. Know the critical path to end goals or sub goals. Make sure goals are properly defined so you know when they are complete against expected benefit(s).
6. Make sure your goal is high enough.
7. Know resources you have in advance and get help where required, like in terms of money, time, relationships. When you work towards your goals those resource would take a hit, so remember to take the price you would pay into over all equation.

Day 3 - Pic 2Remember 7 things to remember when executing your goals: After proper planning, execution holds the key to competing the goals to achieve the desired outcome.

1. Be Relentless
2. keep yourself motivated, remember like hunger for food, one need to motivate oneself regularly, may be daily.
3. Organise yourself to save time and focus. Know the difference between urgent, important, good to have and time wasting tasks.
4. Analyse yourself on SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunity and Threats within you as person along with your circumstances and surroundings)
5. Break it down, act regularly like daily when possible.
6. Don’t procrastinating.
7. Review your progress and review goals regularly.

Finally 7 P’s for you positive psychology: One more factor which is important beside planning and execution towards goals is positive attitude towards your goals and life you want to achieve. 

Be Persistent
Be Patience
Be Prepared
Be Progressive
Be Practical
Be Passionate
Have Perceptive.Day 2 - Pic 3